Can you being in love while living alone?

Truth is, living alone is tough.

But so does living with someone else.

It takes me sometimes to recognize that I do need love. No, I want love.

Not sure how would I frame it, but for now, it’s on the selfish side of the coin.

I want to be loved.

I want to have someone who would wake up next to me and say, “Hello beauty, good morning”. In Vietnamese, in English, in Japanese, or in any language. Just being as cheesy as it is.

Would he kiss me on my forehead? I don’t know. Would we make coffee together? Maybe. The sun will shine into our room through the window, and wind will softly blow.

Sometimes in between our next screen time and commute hours, we would whisper nice things to each others. We would wish the other to enjoy their works. Because joy is the best bless we could have felt. Our hearts are content, and we would probably be thankful for being together.

I just want a simple moment like that. Or perhaps that’s what I would like to imagine how and with who I would like to grow old with.

These were the small romantic things that I miss. Or perhaps, I have never really had.

I used to dislike romantic movies, because I dislike how they painted a rather unrealistic pictures of how a relationship could work. I thought I did not deserve better, and I would never get into a relationship because boys were disrespectful and did not show affection that much. School, works, and family came first before having a partner. Yet simply now that I have a balance of the three, I want more.

I want to have a boyfriend.

Sounds superficial, but now I feel courageous enough to tell the world that I want it.

Someone who would love me for who I am.

Someone who will be kind to me. And let me walk first.

Someone who would hug me when I’m hurt. And someone who would make me nice soup when winter arrives.

Someone who would let me know everything would be ok when I cry, and not leave me when I’m bed-sick.

Ok just kidding, I don’t want to be bed-sick.

Living alone and surviving the pandemic was an accomplishment within itself, that I felt proud of. But I wanted to move to the next stage of my life now. Where I would be able to have a partner, who I would be grateful to have, to love, and to share my moments with. Because I was fine being by myself, and I think I was able to grow during the time, or much of it. Now I want to be able to grow with someone else too.

Just let me know, what it is like to be in love.