There’s an Instagram culture dedicated to loathing the 9-5 job. I was, obviously, being an early Gen Z, part of it. Not because I despite the dull and mundane work week’s fixation on time, but I’m all for autonomy and flexible schedule. Perhaps I was very in love with the idea of doing whatever I want whenever I wanted, and don’t care so much about the consequences. Exactly, I DID NOT care so much about the consequences. Especially consequences of the things I do for the sake of passion and thrill of doing it. Things went pretty lit after a long period of time, when I let myself off the hook and floated.
And then it hit me that I was not doing enough. Thought I was being very irresponsible with everyone else, include myself, include my future.
And before paying too big of a price, at some points, I did realize, to be a grown up, and to move far into the future, sometimes you also have to do things that you hated, and you despited not doing. Not because you are forced to, but it must come form a place that you know doing so bring more significant values to any other immediate leisure and interest. Things like spending time for your family, or taking care of your sick bed kids. Things like admitting mistakes and catch up with responsibilities assigned to you. Those things are important, yet sometimes because we chase leisure and avoid pressure, we ran away from it.