If you find out someone wasn’t as great as you had thought

would you judge a person based on her past

If you find out someone wasn’t as great as you had thought, what would you do?

Would you think that “oh, she/he is just as imperfect as I am.”

Or would you think that “omg, what an asshole! I can’t believe she/he did that!”

Would you think that “ah it’s ok she/he is just a human.”

Or would you think that “I would never associate myself with she/he ever again.”

You see, living is ironically difficult, because most of the times, when we learn about the world, there are so many things that fit our ways of thinking, and then there are other that don’t. We don’t want to be term “judgemental” because it isn’t “inclusive” enough, yet the more you become older, the more you realize that everybody must, and should have their judgements of what is right and what is wrong. The easy part is to recognize them, the challenging part is how you bring that belief system into harmony with your actions, and in harmony with your surrounding or vaster community which you learn from, take the support, and contribute to.

At some points in life, you will struggle to find that your belief system isn’t so aligned with those of whom you love and respect, and sometimes, you either felt disappointed because they did not live to your expectations, or felt the fear of violating that common trust knowledge. Though it might not yield to the direct reaction, these disappointments are valid, and it is a sign that there is a conflict in trust. But this doesn’t mean that it’s wrong. It just means that there’s a gap, or an overlap in understanding, and therefore there is an opportunity for you both to work on it. And it’s a long conflict resolution, but, you should rather walk through it rather than running away from it, if it really matters to you.

Depends on how well you know a person,…Sometimes, you don’t know them at all. Sometimes, you know them only well enough to be supportive and be kind. Sometimes, you know them only through one facet of being. Sometimes, you know them via others. Sometimes, you know them because they trust you enough to share with you who they actually are.

Would you judge that person based on that different and chaotic past, or can you accept who they are as a person in the current time and have trust in them for the future?

Would you drop that person out of your list of priorities, or would you choose to accommodate them and provide them with more help or resources?

Would you neglect that person’s importance and worth, or would you recognize that the wounds and scars are valuable parts of who they are and what make them special?

It’s up to you.


Published by Igobiebb

B (Q.Trang) is a creative multipotentialite who has lived away from home since fourteen, currently living in Tokyo city. She loves writing, cooking, swimming, talking to people and chasing thrills.

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